Cry When it Hurts

Many people complain saying, “Life is so unfair”. Life is FAIR I say, because it is unfair to everybody. All of us have that insufficiencies or maybe insecurities, we get to see from others things that we’ve always wanted to have, we all know that it hurts a lot.
I can define pain as a drastic feeling that triggers tears to come out and is sometimes uncontrollable. No one likes it! I reacted a lot, agreeing, to a punch line from a book entitled “The Fault In Our Stars” that says, “Pain demands to be felt”. I am 100% sure that no human has ever existed on earth that had not encountered or experienced pain or adversity.
Pain is supposed to be a momentary feeling yet it can last for a very long time when it’s not settled within us. It may in fact cause a mental disorder called Post-traumatic syndrome also known as Post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD). It is a problem of the inner-self, especially in the mind, of a person who underwent a terrifying event in the past and just negatively reacted to it long after. Unsettled pain may result to ignorance of the things happening around which is so dangerous.
According to researchers, a person with Post-traumatic stress disorder experiences severe anxiety, nightmares and frequent flashbacks about the event. The things they need to have are time and good self-care. But the question is, how can this be prevented?
For me it’s simple, just cry, cry when it hurts the most, cry when your heart cannot bear the pain any longer, cry and let go of the ache, cry and then accept the not-so-good happenings in the past.
Others may think that crying is for the weak ones, this I strongly disagree. Crying actually helps ease the pain, it lets you pour out all the disappointments, failures, rejections and hardships.

So if you are undergoing such difficult situation right now, having hard time to let go of the wrong decisions made in life and have all enough reasons to give up, think back the time you chose to be strong and why you stayed strong. Go through it and you’ll surely overcome it. You’ll become a better version of you, stronger than ever before. It’s okay to pause for a while and cry when it hurts.

Written by: Irish Alonzo
Photo Credit: Reference.com

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A bit of Love

That moment I laid my eyes on you was the moment I knew would change my life. When you loomed in front of me, leered, smiled and held my hand… I felt the spark. When you said “hi” and I said “hello” was the start of our quixotic love story. When you asked my favorite color I knew you would paint my world. When you showed me the real you, you allowed me to enter into your life.

Firsts would always be superb and endings would often be heart-rending. Reality might be excruciating but somehow it taught me lessons.

(A moment of silence)…

As I was flipping the pages of your book I noticed some missing folios…I was there to fill your emptiness. I was the one who wrote the most exciting part of your life. I was there during your downcast. I was there holding on, even though there were a lot of antagonist in this story…but you weren’t there after all.

I was once in love with a coward…

You showed me the realm of love. You exposed me to notions of fantasies, how enchanting it was to be in love, you filled my world with sweet-smelling words… …

‘twas indeed a very nice journey. But like how you suddenly appeared into my life was how you instantly disappeared as well.

(Sigh)…

Remember that one dusky evening, I was there standing in front of you under the dainty moon. I will never forget how romantic it was; how you gazed at me, how you held my hand like the first time we met, how you kissed me on the forehead, how you slowly touched my hair and…

… how you run away when I said those three words and eight letters to you.

I was left there startled in despair as I watched you slowly vanishing away. ‘twas the most romantic night yet the most throbbing moment as well.

Again…

That moment I laid my eyes on you was the moment I knew would change my life. You turned those blissful thoughts to dreariness.

When you loomed in front of me, leered, smiled and held my hand… I felt the spark. Those sparks that killed me…

When you said “hi” and I said “hello” was the start of our quixotic love story. A delusion of what I thought it could be.

When you asked my favorite color I knew you would paint my world. And so you swathed my world with murkiness.

When you showed me the real you, you allowed me to enter into your life. But you pushed me out right away.

That moment… The moment when I first met you, I knew you would slay my heart and I should’ve saved my heart for someone worth dying for.

Written by: Marydel Mitch Flores

The Bitter Truth: Why does everyone hate Valentine’s Day

Why does it seems like all single folks hate Valentine’s Day? Why does every time Valentine’s day is fast approaching you’ll hear a lot of rants from bitter people?  This seems to be a growing trend nowadays most especially to the younger generation. But I wonder what makes it different from any other occasions like Christmas, New year or Thanksgiving? Where in fact it’s just a day meant to bring you closer to your loved ones.

Valentine’s Day is actually a day of love but this is not only for couples. Instead of being a day of love, this has become a day for single folks to grumble about how frustrated and lonely they are.

First of all, there are actually a lot of reason to be happy of rather than being jealous or discouraged about celebrating Valentine’s Day as single. Single folks out there have absolutely no reason to be bitter on that day or any other day because you are indeed loved by your family and friends so better stop the pity party. You may not have a perfect Facebook or Instagram- worthy relationship but I know for sure you have your family and friends with you, who loves you better than the love you’re looking for.

Why not just think of all the things people in a relationships deal with every day. Would you enjoy ditching your friends for your significant other? Would you want to take a four hour fight just because you did not immediately reply on his/her message? Would you like the feeling the need to constantly attached to your phone so you can update someone’s every move? or would you just stay calm and wait for God’s perfect time because he’s still busy writing the best love story you’ve been yearning for?

There is more to life than to be in a relationship right now.  So, instead of posting rants on Facebook about your nonexistent love life which is actually yet to come, why not just celebrate Valentine’s Day to show to your family and friends how much they mean to you.

Self pity, frustrations and acrimony is not the right attitude that you should acquire. Beautiful things happen when you distant yourself form negative vibes, it wouldn’t help you anyway. Just surround yourself with happy thoughts and be happy for those people around you.

Rather than complaining about not having a date on valentine’s Day, just think of the element of social obligation to it that can cause a little stress to couples.

First, they need to buy gifts, make reservations then end up trying to enjoy meal at an overcrowded restaurant. While if you’re single, you have nothing to worry about. You could just enjoy watching your favorite TV shows or movies, you could just sit all day and enjoy your coffee while reading your favorite book.  There’s no sense in being upset about being single; it probably won’t last forever.

Complaining about being single shows that you’re placing too much of your happiness in being a relationship. Lewis once said “Don’t let your happiness depend on something you may lose.” Being bitter just because you’re single shows that you should learn to realign your priorities in life.

You should never rely your happiness on relationships, instead focus that happiness to Jesus. Keep your eyes on Jesus because he never lost sight of where he was headed. His love is greater than your junk.

You don’t need to rush things looking for a perfect match. Enjoy being single because when the perfect time comes you’ll surely miss everything about it. So, better not be bitter on Valentine’s Day or any other day. Think of the sweeter side rather than the bitter one. Time will surely come when you no longer need to worry about Valentine’s Day but for now, enjoy it and be happy for other people.

Win her heart back!

Nakakalungkot isipin na sa dami ng magagandang alaala na nabuo niyo bilang magkasintahan ay maglalaho, dahil lang sa isang pagkakamaling nagawa. Kung pwede lang sana gawin itong right minus wrong, para sa isang pagkakamali na nagawa ay isang magandang alaala ang mabubura. Pero walang ganun. Ang relasyon ay parang gusali at ang pundasyon naman nito ay tiwala (trust) sa isa’t isa. Kapag natibag ito, lahat ng mga pinaghirapan niyo at mga masasayang alaala ay masasama sa pagguho. Ano nga ba ang maaari kong gawin para maibalik ko ang nasira naming relasyon?

Una, patawarin mo muna sarili mo. Paano mo mapapatawad ng ibang tao kung ang sarili mo nga ay hindi mo kayang patawarin? Ito kasi ang isa sa mga dahilan kung bakit lumalayo ang isang tao sa kanilang kasintahan na kanilang nasaktan. Nakokonsensya sila sa kanilang nagawa at patuloy parin silang naninirahan sa past. Tandaan, Wag mo gawing hadlang ang nakalipas para ihinto mo ang nasayang niyong relasyon. Kung mahal mo talaga siya, gumawa ka ng paraan. Wag ka magmukmok diyan sa gilid na parang talunan. Laban kapatid!

Kung napatawad mo na ang iyong sarili, malamang ready ka na sa pangalawang hakbang. Ang pangalawang hakbang na kailangan mong gawin ay ligawan siya ulit. Pero ang pangliligaw na ito ay kailangan mo talagang paghirapan. Ibuhos mo ang lahat ng makakaya (effort) mo para ipakita mo sa kanya na mahal na mahal mo parin siya. Naalala mo yung sinabi ko na ang relasyon ay parang gusali? Kailangan mo ulit ito mabuo ng paunti-unti, hanggang sa bumalik ang dati niyang ganda.

Pangatlo. Normal lang yan na pagsungitan ka at mareject ka sa pagsuyo mo sa kanya. Kailangan mo lang ng mahabang pasensya. Kung may mga salita man siyang lagging sinasabi sayo, tulad ng- “Please, convince me more”, “Maghanap ka nalang ng iba mong lolokohin” at ito pa “Patunayan mo pa sakin kung talagang sincere ka, dahil ayaw ko nang masaktan”! Tama ba mga girls?

Pang-apat. Wag kang susuko! Kahit ano mang rejections ang ginagawa niya sayo, as long as wala pang nagpapasaya sa kanyang iba, laban lang ng laban! Wag mo hahayaan na masayang lahat ng effort mo at mawala ang taong mahal mo. Eto na ang tamang panahon para maipakita mo sa kanya na pinagsisihan mo na ang iyong maling nagawa. Huwag kang panghinaan ng loob, mahal ka parin niyan hindi niya lang masabi dahil kailangan pa niya ng proof at sapat na rason kung bakit niya ibabalik ang nasira niyang tiwala sayo. Be patient and time will come, Maipapanalo mo ulit siya.

Pang-lima. Oh ayan, lumambot na ang puso niya sayo at pinatawad ka na niya. Alam mo kung anong sunod? Ipagpatuloy mo lang ang pangliligaw sa kanya. Pagandahin nang pagandahin mo lang ang inyong relasyon. Panatiliin itong mainit dahil ang relasyon ay parang kape, kapag hindi na ito mainit, hindi na siya masarap inumin.

Pang-anim! Oo di pa ako tapos! Para iwas temptasyon at para mapanatilihing matibay ang pagmamahal niyo sa isa’t isa. Kailangan niyong ipagitna ang Panginoon sa inyong relasyon. Siya ang iyong magsisilbing gabay tungo sa maganda at masayang buhay.

Isinulat ni: Cladgedon Argawanon